


This won't hurt a bit

by squidears



Series: Hereditas [1]
Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Family Feels, Family Fluff, Gen, Needles, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, massive manga spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-07 11:06:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15907035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squidears/pseuds/squidears
Summary: Rin and Yukio get their shots. Shirou doesn't handle it as well as he would like.





	1. Chapter 1

For the first year of the twins’ lives, Shirou Fujimoto is sure he’s not going to be able to do this parenting thing. From the first minute those boys are in his arms, he feels overwhelmed; what does he know about raising children? What does he know about giving them a normal life?

Being thrown into survival mode for the first few months helps, strangely enough. Shirou has no time to worry about fucking up these kids forever when he’s too busy changing diapers, preparing bottles, and cleaning baby puke of all of his cassocks. Sure, he’s running on an hour of sleep on average, but Shirou has been dealing with sleep deprivation ever since they started waking him up at night for tests when he was five.

 

The first real hurdle comes when the twins are two months old. Misumi schedules their first doctor’s appointment, the _fucking traitor_ , and Shirou has to bundle them up in their car seats and sit in the doctor’s office like he doesn’t want to run away screaming. Seemingly sensing his father’s unrest, Yukio begins to fuss; Shirou pulls a pacifier from his pocket with shaking hands.

A portly nurse in poorly fitted scrubs walks into the waiting room with a clipboard. “Okumura, Rin and Yukio?” Shirou stands up with a car seat in either hand. He grips the handles with white knuckles. “Follow me, sir.”

He doesn’t remember the walk to the room very well, or setting the kids on the exam table still in their seats. Shirou can’t stop staring at the exam table. The babies look out of place on it; they’re too small and vulnerable to be on something so hard and sterile. What if they can tell Rin isn’t human, even with the seal? What if they take Yuri’s boys away from him? What if—

“Relax, Dad,” the nurse says with a knowing smile. Shirou wants to punch her in the face, but he settles for a murderous glare. She remains unflustered. “It’s going to be fine. Both of them look very healthy. The doctor should be here in a few moments, so sit tight.”

She leaves, and a woman with graying hair enters wearing a white coat; Shirou knows it’s unreasonable, but he feels a swell of rage in his chest at the sight of it. “Good morning, Father Fujimoto! I’m Doctor Nakamura.” She approaches Yuri’s sons, _his_ sons, and it’s all Shirou can do to keep himself from diving in front of her and shoving her away.

“Take the coat off.”

Nakamura blinks and turns her head towards Father Fujimoto. “...Excuse me?”

His mouth feels like someone stuffed a wad of dry cotton in each cheek. “I don’t want you wearing that coat around my boys.” Part of him expects her to sneer at him like so many of the doctors from his youth and pull out a hypodermic filled with some sort of sedative for him— but to his surprise, she simply smiles and sheds the coat.

“So you’ve read that study, too! You’re very well read, Father,” she says, hanging the coat up on a hook on the door. Dr. Nakamura grabs the chart near the exam table and begins flipping through it. “I wear a freshly washed white coat every day, but I can understand why you don’t want to take the risk… hm.”

She’s spotted something in the chart. _Shit_. “Why don’t these boys have their neonatal screening results on file?”

“They, uh… just got dropped off at our monastery pretty recently,” he says relatively smoothly. Living with a Morinas contract on his neck has made him a very effective liar. “The mom didn’t leave any medical information.”

Dr. Nakamura side eyes Shirou for a few moments before ultimately taking him at his word. “Alright, we’ll just draw some blood along with giving them their two month vaccinations.”

“Do we have to?” Shirou’s jaw tenses, and his hand curls into a fist on his lap. He knows this is for their own good, but the thought of needles coming anywhere near his boys makes his blood run cold. Giving Rin vaccines is pointless because he’s never going to get sick, and isn’t Yukio too small and weak to have any needles stuck into him?

The doctor raises an eyebrow and looks at Fujimoto like he’s gone insane. He has, in a way. “You’re kidding me, right?”

Shirou swallows, feeling like an idiot. “Sorry. I know it’s what’s best for them, I just—”

“I get it, I really do,” Nakamura says gently, leaning against a counter. Her sympathy makes his skin crawl; there’s no reason for him to be paranoid, but it feels so _fake_. How can someone who jabs kids with needles for a living get it? “Nobody likes seeing their kids get poked and prodded. But unless you want your kids to grow up scared of needles, you have to put on a brave face for them.” Shirou nods silently. The reasonable adult understands; the child who never truly left the lab snarls in protest.

He watches Dr. Nakamura examine both boys with a sense of dread that he can’t shake. Even though Yukio is the smaller, weaker twin, Shirou doesn’t worry about him; the kid has the good sense to whimper and cry when a stranger touches him. Rin has no such reservations, giggling as the doctor prods at his round belly. An image flashes through Shirou’s mind of Rin wriggling on a table at the Asylum, laughing until a scalpel cuts his flesh— he shakes his head to get the image out, but a chill travels down his spine regardless.

Before Shirou knows it, a nurse arrives with a tray full of needles, syringes, and vials. The oldest is up first; Shirou pulls Rin out of his carrier and holds him close to his chest, murmuring apologies into the soft down on his head. Rin continues to coo and babble, even as the nurse prepares to draw his blood.

The nurse is as efficient and quick with each jab as he can be, but Rin’s betrayed wails still feel like an arrow through the heart. Is this what Shirou and his brothers had looked like, once? His hatred for the researchers grows even stronger, somehow; what kind of soulless monster could stand hurting something so innocent for the sake of a _demon_? (He’s already forgotten that Rin is technically a demon; he can’t think of either twin as anything but Yuri’s.)

Putting Rin back in his seat and picking up Yukio for his turn feels like one of the hardest things Shirou has ever done. Yukio started crying as soon as Rin did, and neither of them stop until they’re out of the doctor’s office and on the way home.

 

That night, Shirou informs Kyodo he’s babysitting and drinks himself into a stupor. Misumi stops by his spot in the kitchen at one point, staring at him with a deep sadness in his eyes. “Fuck off,” Fujimoto growls; he hates when Misumi gives him that look. Why pity him now, after everything is said and done?

The balding man opens his mouth, thinks better of it, and walks away.


	2. Inoculation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shirou makes his first controversial parenting decision, with many to follow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There might be another few chapters after this, but this is probably going to be more like a collection of oneshots (heh). Thank you for all of your reviews and kudos, and I hope you enjoy this next chapter! It's fluffier, I promise.

Shirou tries his best to keep his own fears from infecting his sons. It’s what all the parenting books and young moms at playgroup tell him is best for them, and so he makes a very good effort to be chipper and undaunted when the boys have to get their shots— in front of them, at least.   He knows his best efforts have failed when the boys are almost two years old, and Rin bites two nurses before Shirou manages to pin him down with the help of a muscular orderly. Another nurse is quietly comforting Yukio in the background. Shirou has never felt more like a terrible parent.

“NO! NO SHOTS!!” Rin shrieks, and Shirou is nearly thrown back thirty years. For a moment,  _ he’s _ on the table, small and helpless and surrounded by adults with all sorts of sharp implements— and then Shirou is his adult self again in an instant, holding down his son and feeling like the worst dad in the world. The last thing he ever wanted was for his boys to go through what he did, and here he is, helping recreate his own nightmares. Should he have gotten Maruta or Kyodo to take the kids?

No, his boys need their dad here. They need their dad, and they need him to be unafraid. Unflappable.

It takes a few moments for Father Fujimoto to find his Confident Dad Voice— the same one he uses when reassuring the twins there’s no monster near Yukio’s crib, or that the vacuum cleaner isn’t going to eat Rin. “You need the shots to be healthy,” he says, more for himself than Rin; the boy is much too young to understand anything as complex as preventative medicine. “If you stop fighting, it’ll hurt less. And then we can go home and have hot chocolate.”

Lord, why didn’t he try bribing them with treats before now? Rin calms down almost instantly at the promise of something sweet; the orderly sighs in relief. “Ha choklit?”

“Maashmillo?” A small, faint voice asks tearfully from his seat on a nurse’s lap. The nurse looks almost betrayed that it’s  _ this _ that gets Yukio to stop crying, not her endless attempts at comfort.

“Yes, but only if you both are good and stay still. And you don’t bite anyone else today, Rin,” Shirou responds sternly. For once in his short life, Rin is obedient and quiet afterwards; every time he whimpers and begins to struggle throughout the rest of his shots, Shirou says little more than ‘hot chocolate’ and the boy calms down.

Shirou has gotten better at ignoring the way needles make him tense up; he can’t stop the cold sweat on the back of his neck, or his heart pounding in his chest, but he refuses to acknowledge the reaction the way his body clearly wants him to.  _ After this, they’ll only need to come in for shots once a year _ , he reminds himself. He could handle once a year.

“You were a very brave boy,” the doctor says after she’s finished the last vaccination. Rin beams, and the look in his eyes reminds Shirou so much of Yuri that his chest aches with grief for a moment. What would she have done if she were here? Would Yuri have been able to calm her sons down without bribing them? Not for the first time, Shirou is hit with the powerful sense that he should be the last person raising these boys— and yet, at the same time, he’s still the best man for the job. 

Lord, these kids are screwed.

“A strong boy, too,” groans the orderly. Shirou shoots him a glare, panic rising in his chest. He knows Rin is stronger than a normal two year old if Yukio’s strength is any indication, but is his strength clearly  _ inhuman _ ? The seal is only two years old and Rin hasn’t even shown a spark of blue flame, but Shirou wonders if it could be degrading already. Or is his strength simply something that can’t be sealed fully?

Dr. Nakamura unknowingly saves Shirou’s hide. “Adrenaline is a powerful drug. I’ve seen grown men taken down by children half their size,” she says, making a few notes on Rin’s chart. The priest relaxes and shoots her a look of gratitude; if she notices, she doesn’t let on.

Yukio is up next, and even the promise of hot chocolate and marshmallows isn’t enough to keep the boy from bursting into tears. “Nii-chan, Nii-chan,” he cries, reaching out to his brother. Rin squirms violently in the arms of the nurse currently holding him; the next thing Shirou knows, he’s holding a twin on each knee. Rin is gripping Yukio’s hand in his own tiny fist and babbling something nonsensical that seems to be reassuring to his younger brother. Yukio sniffles and whines with each poke, but having both his brother and father nearby helps him calm down relatively quickly afterwards.

“What a good older brother,” the nurse coos at Rin, who sure is receiving a lot of praise for a kid who bit two nurses hard enough to draw blood. Was this that positive reinforcement thing Shirou has been hearing about, or was it because Rin has the kind of round, innocent face that's impossible to stay angry at for long? “And little Yuki-chan was very brave, too,” she continues, pinching the younger twin’s cheek lightly with her thumb. Yukio, ever the more patient twin, bears the indignity admirably.

They’re sent home with Doraemon stickers, which Yukio wears proudly and Rin immediately sticks in his mouth for some reason. The boys seem to not remember the ordeal they’ve just gone through, or maybe they simply don’t care now that it’s over; they watch the same Veggie Tales VHS they’ve insisted on watching daily for the last three months, and Shirou starts to think they’ve completely forgotten about the promised hot chocolate.

The illusion is shattered when Yukio asks, “Tou-san, what about choklit?” and Shirou curses internally. Yukio doesn’t get up to nearly as much trouble as Rin, but sometimes he’s much too smart for his own good.

“Ha choklit!” Rin chimes in, waving his fists. Soon, they’re chanting in creepy twin unison, and that’s when Shirou knows the battle has been lost, and he’s going to have to give his sons a drink guaranteed to ruin their nap schedule. Why did he do this to himself?

Oh, right, because he’d wanted to get out of that damn office as soon as possible and bribery was the best way to accomplish that. What a mess...

Father Fujimoto stands up, holding a twin in either arm as he carries them to their high chairs in the kitchen. “I’m making it, I’m making it,” he says with a sigh. “Quit whining, brats…”

The act of pouring the cocoa mix and hot water into their sippy cups reminds him of the months he’d spent preparing their bottles— it seems like only yesterday they were helpless little things incapable of even rolling over, and now they’re walking and talking like nobody’s business. 

He pours himself his own mug of hot chocolate before handing the twins their sippy cups and a few marshmallows each, taking a seat near the boys. Even though he knows this decision is going to lead to chaos come bedtime, the look of unbridled joy on their faces from something so simple warms his heart. Maybe this parenting thing isn’t too bad after all.

Then Yukio starts crying because his drink is too hot, even though Rin has been chugging his with no issue, and… well, the peace was nice while it lasted.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd like to point out that as a public health student, I am very pro vaccine. Get you and your kids vaccinated, folks!  
> I hope you enjoyed it! This is pretty different from my regular style, so let me know if it works or not.


End file.
